Bachelor Party, Essay Example

Wedding is considered to be one of the most significant events in human life in all parts of the world, and most cultures have an analogue of the bachelor party – a night out shortly before wedding, when future groom and his friends engage in activities, which are considered to be typical for unmarried men, “a final hurrah of single life – a last swing for the fences where no wife or fiancé need be considered” (The Ultimate Bachelor Party Guide). For most people bachelor party is just a fun custom, but its real meaning is much more significant than socializing and doing silly things.

Most of those, who throw bachelor parties, know a golden rule – bride should not be among the invitees. This step is justified, as most brides would not approve of the activities typical for this type of parties, like drinking too much, hiring a stripper, or gambling. Bachelor party is often viewed as an opportunity for the groom to engage in activities, his future wife would not approve, for the last time. Montemuro, the author of the article “Sex symbols: the bachelorette party as a window to change in women’s sexual expression”, writes that these parties are rooted in the idea that marriage requires monogamy. Much of the activities, associated with bachelor parties, include sexual elements – the groom is encouraged to buy a drink to a woman he does not know, to watch porn movies, or random woman is got to massage the groom. Therefore, bachelor party may be viewed as an opportunity to say goodbye to sexual freedom.

Monogamy and “sound” lifestyle, without alcohol, gambling and other imprudent things are seen as the attributes of married life in Western culture. In reality this apprehension is idealistic. Regardless of the family status, lots of men (and a considerable percentage of women) cannot refuse their lifestyles associated with risky behaviors and sexual promiscuity. The statistics of adultery and divorce rates reveal the real attitudes towards marriage in contemporary society. Nowadays wedding vows are broken much more often, than it happened in nineteenth century and earlier. His phenomenon evidences the fact that the significance of marriage has significantly decreased during the past century.

Marriage definitely changes the social status of a man. Bachelor party may be viewed as a kind of initiating ritual, which means his transition to this new status. Jokes that grooms friends play on him, and tasks he has to complete through his “last night out”, are much like tests boys had to pass before entering adulthood in tribes. The “code of silence” about the contents of the bachelor party, and the “no women” rule that still works for most stag nights also prove that bachelor party is, in fact, a ritual.

Yet, unlike the ritual of becoming a man, which is greeted by other males, analysis of the bachelor party customs reveals that getting married is nowadays seen as something close to “necessary evil”. “Feminization and humiliation, accomplished in part by cross-dressing and then stripping (the groom), also expels him from the male group by making him “Other”” (Williams). Getting married is viewed as a manifestation of weakness, which is “punished” through the bachelor party by humiliating and mocking the groom.

Though in many earlier cultures getting married was seen like another stage of initiation into “maleness”, contemporary American culture gives another meaning to this ritual. A male, who decides to enter marriage, is seen as the one who voluntarily refuses “all the joys of life”. As it was previously mentioned, contemporary Western apprehension of wedded life is that of monogamy. The underlying meaning of being married is different for women. It is seen as one of the most important victories in woman’s life, as the act of gaining protection and solidity in one’s life. Therefore, marriage is seen as the act of woman’s domination over male; for man getting married means acknowledging one’s weakness in front of female power.

Withal, the humiliating rituals some bachelor parties include may be viewed from another point. Williams in his article about bachelor parties suggests that male groups perceive expressing affection in traditional ways as a sign of weakness (and, thus, degradation), therefore, their aggressive behaviors are just the expression of deep affection towards the groom. The activities of the groom’s friends may be seen as an expression of support that “male world” is ready to provide him. The bachelor party is usually sponsored by the groom’s best man, and his other friends, which is another argument proving the supportive nature of this custom.  Therefore, the underlying message of bachelor party is that, whilst entering marriage changes the status of man, he is still the part of the male world, and this world is ready to grant him support.

What is interesting about this custom, the basic patterns of bachelor ritual are similar for people of different social classes and ages. The location of the party and the quality of entertainment is, of course, dependent from the costs groom’s friends can afford. Some grooms from Minnesota or Ohio spend their bachelor parties at Las-Vegas casinos or a Los-Angeles strip-clubs, while others throw a party in the local club or restaurant, but the contents is similar – gambling, drinking, watching striptease, flirting etc.

The economical aspect of celebrating bachelor party is also vital to consider. As it was previously mentioned, party location and quality of its contents may vary, therefore, its budget can range from several hundred to several thousands of dollars. Considering the fact that in past decades the similar event for bride, bachelorette party, has also became popular, this adds a considerable sum to the profits of the wedding industry.

Bachelor party is a custom persistent in many parts of the world. Future groom’s male friends organize it for him in order to celebrate his last days of life as a “free” man, independent from his wife’s instructions and desires. Nowadays bachelor, or stag party, usually implicates drinking large amounts of alcohol, visiting strip-clubs, or inviting a stripper to a party location. The groom is often made to perform silly and even humiliating actions. On one hand, bachelor party may be viewed as a ritual of entering the new stage of life, as numerous signs of the ritualistic action are present: women are usually not allowed to enter, the groom has to pass “tests”, the code of silence about the contents of the party exists. On the other, it is an opportunity for the groom’s male friends to express affection towards him in a mannish manner. Bachelor party carries the supportive function, as male is reminded that whilst of the change of the status, he still remains the member of the male community supportive of him. The meaning implicated by this ritual is the end of the “free” life, of the life of the bachelor. Therefore, the meaning of this ritual does not conflict with its practice, as the groom is engaged in the activities that are considered typical and permitted for the bachelor, supposedly for the last time in his life. The economical meaning of bachelor party is also great, as it is quite a widespread custom, and expenditures for it can be quite high.