Developmental Paper, Essay Example

Introduction

For the purposes of understanding human development through an interview, I selected as my subject Ms X, a woman of 78 years.  She is an acquaintance I have made at the supermarket, one who has several times engaged me in casual conversation.  I approached her with the project and she seemed pleased to comply.  We then set a time and date, and met for approximately 45 minutes at a coffee shop by the supermarket.  The following account is based entirely on what Ms X revealed to me, with my own interpretations clearly expressed as such.

Interview and Assessment

Asked to offer a brief account of her life in total, Ms X became highly reflective, if not dramatic.  She insisted more than once that she had nothing to complain of.  Her health was very good, she had a caring boyfriend, and she felt her relationships with her children were mostly positive.  It seemed difficult for her to take a more expansive look, rather than focus on the current state of her life; urged to do so, she expressed that she would “have to” say that her life had been fortunate.  She briefly mentioned a happy childhood, a good marriage, and satisfying work.  At the same time, each statement was qualified; as she touched upon her girlhood, for instance, it was evident that there were sibling issues still bothering her today.  Ultimately, this part of the interview presented duality.  I had the distinct sense that Ms X was referring to a satisfying life more because she was fearful of complaining directly, rather than because this was her true feeling.

We then took the time to more thoroughly go over Ms X’s early life, and she embraced this opportunity.  As noted, she described a happy childhood, but memories were shaded by indications less pleasing to her.  For example, she loved the Christmas holidays because her father would insist on every light in the house burning.  Her mother, however, hated this because she was frugal and it was a waste of electricity, and this invariably created tension in the home.  Then, Ms X spoke of a loving relationship between herself and her sisters, yet she distinctly remembered strong rivalries between.  She also felt that her father encouraged, or was amused by, this competition among the girls.  Ms X did not in any way blame her parents for the circumstances; in fact, she seemed to fully accept this reaction from her father as natural.  It seems her concern then was only holding her own; she proudly affirmed that her father always said she was his smartest daughter.  In terms of Erikson’s stages, what is interesting here is that Ms X did not refer to other children as playmates, but only to her sisters, and this adds a dimension to the initiative vs. guilt stage (Carducci, 2009,  p. 100).  More exactly, and from an early age, Miss X explored interpersonal relations primarily through competing with her siblings to gain parental approval.  This carried into the school years and Erikson’s industry/inferiority stage, in which the child is perceiving either motivation to take an active, integrated role in their environment, or discouraged from doing so (Nevid, 2008, p. 349).  Ms X, in my estimation, falls into a unique place here.  As Erikson has it, the child at this stage either is encouraged to develop a strong ego by virtue of competency acknowledged, or dangerously dissuaded from trying to fit in (Carducci, 2009,  p. 191).  Raised to feel self-worth only through the praise of authority, Ms X focused on excelling in school, and in a way I perceive as more intent on avoiding failure and shame than in gaining in ability or sharing interests.  Similarly, the way in which Ms X recalled her neighborhood was defined by how she believed another would view it.  There were warm memories of being secure and safe, but equally stressed was the family’s status as being high in the community, and the house itself as more valuable than those around it.

This same urgency of proving herself in some fashion superior underscored Ms X’s account of her teenage years.  She proudly asserted that she sang at parties, and lost no time in mentioning that her sisters were not so popular.  She enjoyed this time of her life very much, yet it was presented more as a record of accomplishment, rather than as a happy memory, and even that was marred by bitter fights with her sisters, usually over boyfriends.  This indicated confusion to me  regarding this period of her life.  More exactly, Erikson’s definition of role confusion is strongly indicated.  The forging of a unique identity is critical in the adolescent years, as is well documented; the boy or girl is creating a selfhood which, if shaped by cumulative experience, is nonetheless their own. Equally importantly, the adolescent must perceive and accept this new sense of identity (Zastrow, Kirst-Ashman, 2009, p. 294).  For Ms X, identity was wholly dependent upon success ratios as compared to those of her siblings.  Even her fond recollection of meeting her husband relied on rivalry, as a sister competed for his attentions at the same time.

In discussing her marriage and early adulthood, Ms X appeared to be more grounded in the world around her then.  That is, it may be that marriage finally separated her from the competitive family dynamic, for here she spoke only of devoting herself to her husband, and their joy in having many children.  Interestingly, Ms X never said that she loved children; rather, she loved babies, and this difference is emphasized by her expressing severe trials as her children grew into teens.  The earlier happiness was gone, and here she added that her husband’s alcoholism was another burden she had to bear.  This long period of her life came across to me very much as a time of consistent victimization, in fact, in which she worked in the home to earn income while struggling with increasingly distanced children.  Then, and in a way she herself seemed to find startling, life became something of a vacuum for her.  The children were gone and her marriage was not satisfying, even though she repeatedly maintained that her husband always worked hard for the family.  Here, there seems to be a pronounced dread of stagnation, which goes to Erikson’s seventh stage.  Adults in middle-age who experience generativity, or an active involvement in generating interests outside of themselves, typically do not reflect the personality type of Ms X.  Studies show that such adults are usually agreeable in nature and relatively free of neuroses, and open to new experiences (Sigelman, Rider, 2008, 334).  This requires a level of emotional stability Ms X does not appear to possess.  Put another way, I had the impression that Ms X consistently believed that performing the roles she had been assigned, from achieving as a girl in school to having children, were to reward her with a level of satisfaction she has never truly felt.  When the activity itself ceased, then, she was not equipped to create for herself a gratifying mode of living. 

If Ms X could be said to exhibit a facet of Erikson’s final stage, that of ego integrity or despair, I have the uncomfortable feeling that she resides between the two.  In this phase, life experience is reviewed and assessed by the individual, either consciously or less overtly, and satisfaction tends to promote a sense of peace and over-all accomplishment (Zastrow, Kirst-Ashman, 2009,  p. 294).  As noted, Ms X adamantly maintained a conviction in having moved through her life in a successful way, in that she met all challenges well.  At the same time, she herself seems baffled by a lack of internal peace, and my feeling is that, never having established ego integrity, the absence of supporting circumstances leaves her adrift.  Ironically, feuding with her still-living sisters appears to offer the only excitement she knows today, even as she outwardly expresses a general content with how her life has evolved.

Conclusion

I must reinforce that my assessments are my own, and that it is likely Ms X would disagree with my interpretations, at least to an extent.  At the same time, I believe that our summary portion of the interview confirms my impressions.  I asked Ms X to reflect and consider what, if anything, she would change in her life if she could.  Her immediate reaction was to insist that she would change nothing, but this was followed by a more thoughtful response.  This took the form of lamenting, not so much the choices she had made, but their consequences.  For example, she insisted that, loving babies, she never would have had fewer children, but she left the issues related to those children as inexplicable mysteries, and of a kind she could not be expected to address.  Similarly, she professed to deeply regretting the long, ongoing fights with her sisters, but could imagine no way by which they could have ever been avoided.  My ultimate impression of Ms X is that of long and subdued frustration and discontent.  She appears cheerful, yet there is a watchfulness still about her.  I am inclined to think that, never having had the opportunity to forge an ego integrity, Ms X has lived her life dependent on the shifting levels of admiration and conflict around her.  Her development, in a sense, has been consistently not developed, but locked in a framework established very early.

References

Carducci, Bernardo J.  (2009).  The Psychology of Personality: Viewpoints, Research, and Applications. Hoboken: John Wiley & Sons.

Nevid, Jeffrey S. (2008).  Psychology: Concepts and Applications.  Belmont: Cengage Learning.

Sigelman, Carol K., & Rider, Elizabeth A.  (20080.  Life-Span Human Development.  Belmont: Cengage Learning.

Zastrow, Charles, & Kirst-Ashman, Karen K. (2009).  Understanding Human Behavior and the Social Environment.  Belmont: Cengage Learning.