Family Genogram, Essay Example

According to the Bowen Theory, the family is an emotional unit that is filled with complex interactions, and are intensely connected emotionally.(Bowen Center, nd.)  While I will agree to disagree to a degree, to be honest I have a big family that was once very close as we were growing up. We were always at each others houses, and we always held big family events. However, through years of family conflict after my father took ill, and money begin to dwindle many disappeared. I only keep in touch with my grandparents, parents, my sister, cousins, and other immediate family. Generally the people described in my genogram are fairly close to me, except for a few exceptions. The family strife began with my great-grandparents on my mother’s side. They did not get along, and they did not like each other. My great-grandfather had a drinking problem which he acquired from serving in the army, and contributed to him dying at an early age. His drinking create tense relationships with his wife and children that harbored feelings of anxiety and dejection that was passed on. This is development that McGoldrick points out is passed on from one generation to another. (McGoldrick, Garcia-Peto, 2011) My great-grandmother, who was homemaker, died of breast cancer, which also became a factor for my grandmother, a former teacher; however, she survived. My great-grandfather’s drinking problem seem to pass on to my grandfather, who also passed on the anxiety and problems to my uncle.

My grandparents from both sides are still alive, and they are trying to be more health conscious as they are getting older. They are both retired, with my grandfather also serving in the army, and my grandmother a retired nurse. My grandmother made my father give up smoking and drinking which helped his heart disease, and other complications. While he stopped, my uncle (mother’s brother) has continued to drink and gamble, which has caused conflict between him and my mother. They are not cut off, or in conflictual relationship, however, they used to only get along when they both drinked at family gatherings. I fear that his drinking problem is a generational factor, in which was passed down from my great-grandfather to my uncle. When my uncle decides to have children, alcoholism will be a substantial factor in his family. Their conflict had also hindered him from visiting my father, who is remarkably close with, when he fell ill. They hardly speak, and when in the same company, my mother does not share a glance. Their problem’s stem from childhood, as he was favored over my mother, and he bullied her for being overweight as a child. This sibling rivalry between the two is generally felt by the adults, but hopefully as McGoldrick points out that, that “as they age the preoccupations of earlier life cycle phases will diminish.”(McGoldrick, Garcia-Preto 2011)

The relationship between my mother and my aunt is great, although when they were younger, my aunt tried to get with my father behind my mother’s back. For a short while until I was born they did not speak, and family dinners were eaten in separate rooms. However, they aged, and they have grown closer as my aunt has went through her own issues. On my father’s side things are relatively calmer. My great-grandparents died of old age, and my grandparents are still alive. My grandmother a homemaker, is extremely religious, she was raised in a strict family, and she raised my father in a strict family. Her parenting passed on to my father’s style of parenting, which although I appreciate, I did not agree with. As told before, there were certain things me and my sister, whom I am extremely close with could and could not do. I do not believe that neither of us will pass on his parenting style to our families. There is conflict between my ex-uncle and my twin cousins, he was abusive to my aunt, and they are divorced. The fear is that the cycle will repeat with my twin cousins as one is in a relationship with an imposing young man. This is big red flag, and an issue that is potentially passed on.

As quoted earlier, I am no longer close with a lot of my family members, once the money was gone, they were gone too. Their abandonment hurt at first and contributed to my depression and feelings of anxiety as I dealt with school and my family issues. However, I am lucky that issues such as drinking, gambling, heart disease, or breast cancer has not affected me. The strengths that I am proud that passed on is the honor in serving in the military, the women’s pride in being a homemaker, a teacher, and a nurse is what helped build the strong female and male roles that I aspire to be. My family each made making the best out of a bad situation their priority, they were entrepreneurs and go-getters, while some family members did not pick up on those traits, others have. The red flags, as pointed out is the continual development of passing down anxiety and alcoholism throughout the family. Alcohomism took the life of my great-grandfather, and while my grandfather has stopped, my uncle still continues. Other red flags include one of my twins cousins in a potential abusive relationship, as they saw their father hit on their mother on regular. This is a vicious cycle, and can ultimately lead to death.

In drawing conclusions, the genogram that is formed is how I see my family now. There are some serious issues with some family members, however, overall they represent a family unit that has survived war, illnesses, and other factors that I hope do not pass on to the next generation. In forming this genogram, it could be useful to therapist that see family issues where relationships are strained between siblings and parents. Also, the seriousness of alcoholism, gambling, and domestic violence can serve as a tool in diagnosing the underlying issues, as well as addressing where the stress is that has caused unbalanced, and create a multi-level framework about the family system where the breakdown in the life cycle functions are clear. The therapist values and responsibilities of reporting any domestic violence crimes is crurical in preventing a serious problem, that can be passed on to future generations. As a clinician they will see several types of families that have generational dysfunction, it up to the therapist to assess the problems through detailed questioning to alleviate the stress and the issues that drive people to make bad decisions, which causes problems in their families. In helping with serious issues such as domestic violence and alcoholism the therapist with the family’s help can stage an intervention, that will gauge the family’s level of cooperativeness and level of true concerns in the family. The families can think work together in a non-confrontational manner to come to a future solution.

References

Bowen, Murray. (n.d). “Bowen Theory.” Retrieved at http://www.thebowencenter.org/pages/theory.html

McGoldrick, M., Carter, B., & Garcia-Preto, N. (2011). The expanded family life cycle: Individual, family, and social perspectives (4th Ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn and Bacon