Fernando Sorrentino Short Story, Essay Example

Life is a very complicated thing from the point of view of its combination of personal and social reflections. For example, a separate individual may be absolutely sure that he or she is a very significant personality at work or in a particular social group; he/she will live with this feeling and will make all actions and judgments deriving from that point. However, in the flow of time an unpredictable situation, a sudden turn in life may show how false the self-esteem and self-positioning of a person may be. This is really a shock that is hard to overcome, though it is often possible to get the best out of it and reshape one’s attitude to life and his/her personal position in it. All people are significant in their own way, but they are also a tiny part in the entire humankind, no matter how meaningful their role is relatively to others. The hardest step is to understand the relativity of human significance and to turn to self-research in order to realize one’s true purpose in life, to listen to inner callings and considerations.

Many people come across such crisis situations at some moment of their lives. It is complicated to handle life’s setbacks because the inherent value of one’s personality, soul, character and lifestyle constitute the basis for their self-esteem and shape the direction of their future achievements. People who underestimate themselves are capable of little achievement because they are not motivated, tired of constant failures and not believing in their own forces. There are surely some situations in which people fail because of over-estimation of their strength, wisdom and capability; their pride brings them to the dead end at which they forcibly face the reality of their meaningless, which is surely a shock. However, stories of average people with the normal self-esteem and beliefs in their own forces, importance and value are more common in everyday life, and my story is one of such cases.

To understand why the internal change is so difficult means to realize what our life and self-esteem consists of. In general, all people constitute a microcosm, being a complete human organism with its soul, mind, wisdom and strength. At the same time no-one lives an isolated way of life, so each person is able to identify his or her environment – it is their family, friends, colleagues, enemies, acquaintances, beloved people etc. Every person deals with others for many reasons including pleasure, duty, work, necessity etc. These interactions finally constitute a social network, with every individual in the world being a part of such a construction. Constant interactions give the sense of meaning and importance to an individual, no matter how insignificant they are; so in case they are taken away or changed drastically a person may be shocked to realize that all he or she used to have were only false beliefs.

I also found myself in such a situation once – I am a Chinese living in the USA for more than 12 years by now, so I experienced the whole range of complications an immigrant with a highly different language experiences in an unknown, indifferent country. Coming to the USA, I did not know English, but I was coming on my own will, filled with the desire to start a new life, to change something in myself and in the surrounding world, to find out something new and to learn completely new things.  However, as soon as I came to the USA, I realized that nobody cared about me, and more than that, nobody cared to make an effort to try to understand me. When in trouble, I saw that it was better for Americans to imitate not understanding me than to step in and help me. I could read the message in their eyes: “Why should I care? She is nobody to me, and I have much business for today. I am sure someone else will help her”.

This message was in everyone’s eyes, as they all really believed in their own sincerity and friendliness. One of them had no time, another one did not know how to do that, and the third one was in a hurry and pretended not to hear. All of them were friendly to their close people, and each of them believed he or she was a true friend, a sincere person who would come to help if case his or her friend were in need. But I wondered how they could have called themselves friendly and sincere if they were not able to help an unknown person in some trifles. It hurt me much because I looked for the problem inside myself, which was very painful and destructive for my self-esteem. As the main character of Sorrentino’s essay, I still tried to contact someone, throwing pieces of paper out of the window. However, nothing helped – I finally realized that I was alone in the large pragmatic and falsely friendly world of the USA. I understood that there would be no place for me if I did not change my own vision of the situation, and I did.

Now I understand that the key to success in the hostile, unknown surroundings is adjustment and reconsideration of one’s role in it. Instead of trying to deserve attention and to win some recognition from the US citizens who treated me in a cold and indifferent way, I decided to create this place with my own hands. I found a job (though it was really hard for a Chinese at first), I found friends with who I shared interests and attitudes, not only the skin color, and I found love in the USA – I created my own social network and took the place in it. Now I understand that every person should not relax thinking that in case he or she has friends, relatives, a family and a job, then the globe rotates around him or her, but should constantly work on the improvement of social relations and finding his or her place in life, not to get lost and not to remain alone in the seemingly friendly world.

References

Sorrentino, Fernando. ‘A Lifestyle’. In Sanitary Centennial and Selected Short Stories. Translation and introduction by Thomas C. Meehan. Austin: University of Texas Press, 1988.