Problems of Women and Men in Stepfamilies, Research Paper Example

Abstract

Stepfamilies have become an everyday occurrence in contemporary society. A lot of people have great difficulties in addressing the arising issues along with pressures which are associated with the stepfamilies. This has been found to a thorny transition which is negotiated by most families. This paper has considered the past literature addressing the issues of stepfamilies with the aim of identifying the problems associated with the stepfamilies and the factors that contribute to the situation. The importance of conducting research in the same field cannot be underestimated due to the need of coming up with first hand information about the issue.

Hypothesis

• Divorced people opt to engage in step marriage to give adequate care to the children
•  Men and women involved in step marriage are unable to satisfy all the requirements of their children

Research questions

• What are the potential problems that men and women face in step marriage?
• What are the factors contributing to the problems?

Aims and objectives

The objectives and aims of the research were to identify the various problems encountered by couples in a step marriage and to identify the factors that contribute to the same.

Introduction

A stepfamily refers to is a household in which two adults are biological or adoptive parents and it may be in form of heterosexual, gay, or lesbian, with a child from a previous relationship, who elects to marry or to cohabit. Research indicates that the United States has the highest rates remarriage globally. Available statistics show that about 85% of Americans who divorce opt to remarry later in life. Further research indicates that about 13% of women as well as men have been married twice in their life and that 3% have married three or more times. High divorce and remarriage rates mean the elderly will rely more on stepchildren and step-grandchildren than on their biological children and grandchildren (LeBey, 2004).

Literature review

Available statistics indicate that, the possibility of a wealthy man to remarry is higher and that men in most cases are financially better off as compared to women, and therefore their “worth more.” Divorced women have been associated with more financial problems, thus for women, the best option to escape poverty is through remarrying.

Most of the adults who contemplate to engage in new relationship are already parents. The presence of children is an important factor in the decision to remarry or not. In rare occasions do divorced men have child custody, and therefore their dating is freer. The focus of divorced women is a financially stable man. Most children may be proud with their single mothers and may develop a negative attitude towards the behavior of the parents in dating partners. It is a wish of the custodial mothers to have a father figure for their children while most men are against parental responsibilities. The presence of children in most cases therefore limits the chances for remarriage.

According to research, it has become evident that, there is a fundamental makeover in the experience of the children once the parents have engaged in remarriage. One factor contributing to this effect is the change in the role expectations. A stepfamily has higher chances to have roles that are less clearly defined for remarriages as compared to the first marriages. The family members in remarriages may be at diverse stages in the life cycles of the concerned, with conflicting goals and activities.

A clear understanding of the problems affecting the women as well as men in stepfamilies, it is important to understand the myths surrounding remarriage. Research has indicated that, these myths can lead to inaccurate expectations. According to the nuclear family myth, the members of the family are expected to love and feel close to one another. Another important myth that is worth consideration is the compensation myth which stipulates that, the new mate is expected to fulfill everything that the problematic old mate was unable to. According to the instant love myth, the new stepparents presume an intimacy and authority with the children that they have not earned. The Rescue Fantasy on the other hand indicates that, the stepparents think they will “shape kids up” and rescue them from a negative or lenient custodial parent.

Research conducted by Fassler, (1988) indicates that about 60% of remarriages end in divorce. Fassler also documents that, the most lasting remarriages are between people 45 or older. The reasons that have been attributed to re-divorcing include lack of problem-solving skills, seeing divorce as a “quick” solution for dissatisfaction, If women have a young infant the couple may not have as much time for their relationship. A lack of commitment and failure to maintain family boundaries is another potential contributor.

Gottman, (1997) found that a clear understanding of the Characteristics of Stepfamilies is an important step towards an clear oversight of the problems that women and men face in stepfamilies. Stepfamilies are characterized by a complex structure. It is an expectation of the stepfamily to cope with the prevailing unique tasks which are non existent in ordinary families. Members of the stepfamily often experience more stress in addition to conflict as compared to the nuclear families. The integration of the stepfamily typically takes years rather than months. Important relationships may be cut off or end abruptly, and others spring up overnight. There are continuous transitions and adjustments instead of stability (Gottman, 1997).  Stepfamilies are less cohesive than nuclear or single parent households. Stepfamilies need great flexibility in their everyday behavior. Stepfamily members often have unrealistic expectations. There is no shared family history. There may be many loyalty conflicts. Roles of stepfamily members are often ambiguous. A clear understanding of these facts that hold in cases of stepfamily leads to a comprehensive acknowledgement of the problems that are associated with the families.

Berman, (1986) studied the issues of parenting in Stepfamilies and arrived at some important deductions that explain the causes of the prevailing problems in the stepfamilies. According to Berman, distribution of emotional resources in a stepfamily can be difficult. There is a need for developing parent-child relationships once two people have opted for remarriage. Berman also postulates that the children in single mother and remarried households are more likely than those in nuclear families to have emotional and behavioral problems (Berman, 1986).

Further research indicates that, the relationships with stepchildren are often more difficult for stepmothers than for stepfathers. It is therefore a requirement for the stepparents to establish discipline and closeness. Discipline and authority especially between stepfathers and adolescent stepchildren are two of the biggest problems in stepfamilies. Some stepparents act as quasi-kin, midway between parent and friend. There are gender differences in children’s adjustment. Stepdaughter-stepfather relationships are usually more negative than those between stepsons and stepparents of either sex. Intergenerational relationships can provide an important sense of continuity to children at a time when other factors seem to be changing rapidly (Henry & McCue, 2009).

Research methodology
The objective of the research is the identification of the problems of women and men in stepfamilies. It is important to note here that this research was mainly based on the interviews even though other research methodologies were briefly discussed.

Research Procedures

Use of research tools such as questionnaires, interviews, relevant journals, periodicals and data sampling will be utilized in the process of conducting this research. A team of experts will be needed to conduct the research. In implementing the activities, both the quantitative and qualitative approaches will be considered, whereby qualitative data will be those based on the spoken words while the quantitative data would be generated from the overall data collected based of accuracy and efficiency.

Choice of research philosophy

An important aspect that is of great significance in this research was the research strategy. It’s the research strategy that indicated which methods a researcher adopted to answer the research objectives or questions on the problems of women and men in stepfamilies.

Survey was one of the most important research strategies in conducting this research. The use of surveys facilitated for the collection of a large amount of data from a large population. This implies that the researcher conducted surveys and question specific groups of people to obtain large amount of information relevant to the subject of the survey. This was on respect to the problems of women and men in stepfamilies (Papernow, 1993).

The data was collected from the people either via questionnaire or orally. The purpose of the survey was to establish and analyze views of respondents in order to find what they think about the problems of women and men in stepfamilies.  However, despite the fact that the views from a large number of respondents was gathered through the survey strategy, the data obtained did not all reflect to the objective of the research at depth.

Ethical consideration

The participants were supplied with different questionnaires based on specific areas of interests. The approval or the disapproval of participation was based on its merits and demerits as determined after conducting the research. All the participants were given their respectively informed consent to facilitate for their contribution in the research. They were informed prior to the research, the purposes, potential reimbursement together with the potential risks which could be associated with their contribution in the research. Ethical standards had to be applied during the entire process of the research.

Limitations encountered

During the research, several challenges were encountered. Some respondents were not willing to cooperate in the process of carrying out of the interview. Some questionnaires were not properly answered while others remained blank forcing the possibility of assumptions to be included here. There also existed the tedious and long procedures that were applicable so as to access the entrance to the premises, some of which were government offices, which were coupled by writing of letters for granting of permission. Some of the officials were adamant in taking part in the study and appropriate incentives had to be devised to entice them to give the information that they had.

Conclusion

Remarriage rate was identified to be very high in the Western countries and most of the adults have children from their previous union. Issues of communication as well as conflict have been identified with these families. The victims have encountered many problems allied to the required commitments and the expectations of the stepfamilies. Other issues of conflict involve the consensus on with regard to child rearing; the biological relationships in parent-child; and the relationships between the stepparents to the stepchild. Some external factors such as the relations to the former partners and the issues of social support compared to isolation also play a significant role in their coexistence.

References

Berman, C., (1986). Making It As the Stepparent: New Roles & New Rules. HarperCollins.

Gottman, J., (1997). Meta-emotion: How Families Communicate Emotionally. NJ.: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.

Fassler, D., (1988). Changing Families: A Guide for Kids and Grown-Ups. Waterfront Books.

Henry, P. & McCue, J. (2009). Journal of Divorce and Remarriage v. 50 no. 3

LeBey, B., (2004). Remarried with the Children: 10 Secrets in Successfully Blending &  Extending Your Family. N Y: Bantam.

Papernow, P. L., (1993). Becoming Stepfamily: Patterns for Development in Remarried Families. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.