The Views’ of Kids on Dating, Essay Example

The Views of Parents’ Versus the Views’ of Kids on Dating

Children often find it very uncomfortable when their parents’ date because it seems odd for a parent to be doing the same thing they are doing. They view their parents’ as caretakers and find it hard to cope with the dating game. Children and parents’ share a totally opposite view on dating, which is not surprising. Statistics show that male children adjust easier to their parents’ dating after a divorce or relationship separation than do females. The reason for this is females tend to want to keep their parents’ close to them and feel the date may want to take the parent away from them. However, one female reported that her mother became a much nicer person to be around after she started dating again. Other children reported that their parent’s boyfriend played with them and had more time to show them extra-curricular activities than did their biological father. (New York Amsterdam News 2007).

Most foreign parents forbid their children to date whilst in their teenage years and mandate them to devote all of their time to studies. They prefer their child to focus on a college degree then start looking for the right spouse. Often they arrange marriages to ensure their child has found the right or suitable spouse.

Kids don’t really look at who they are going to marry at a young age. Often young daughters go into fairy tale land and dream about marriage but overall they maintain close relationships with boys at an early age and as they mature into puberty they may find a boyfriend and move onto another boyfriend rather quickly forming no real bonds with anyone. “Dates are used to have fun and to get to meet more people and to listen to boys if they have something to say”, reported an eight year old. Anita, a nine year old, stated “boys need someone to clean up after them”. (Owens’s World 2009).

Foreign kids are bred a little differently and do not date socially. They think of dating as something that does not happen in society. They view the opposite sex as friendship only until after college and their studies have been completed. They learn these values through their parents who instill education must be completed first in order to land a good job and to land a good mate. The children realize that most females will become degreed yet will stay at home and raise the children until the children are of school age then they can go to work on their careers if they want to. The man of the house will provide for the family until the last child is of school age. The foreign families are very traditional by nature. Even most of the American born foreign children are taught the same traditional values as the one’s born native to their home country.

Even though parents’ and children may share opposite views on dating it is up to the parents’ to guide their children in the right and virtuous way so that the child will live a highly moral and ethical life and be successful with anything he/she chooses. The children must come to understand dating is to be taken seriously and at the same time can be fun but the child must be emotionally mature enough to do so.

Parents’ feel their children should be guided and have a structured environment and set of rules to live by because this promotes good discipline and helps children to cope with the world on their own. Parents’ feel an adequate curfew for teenagers is by dawn and for older teenagers is by 10pm-midnight. They may also want to help choose their children’s clothes to ensure they are dressing appropriately in public as a reflection of themselves. Children feel often their curfew should be extended or completely eliminated and so often feel they should be able to choose their own clothing to represent their own style. There is much conflict with parents’ and children amongst these two topics because parents’ feel a child is a reflection of themselves and children are searching for their own identity.

Works Cited

New York Amsterdam News Retrieved March 28, 2010 from, < http://www.britannica.com/bps/additionalcontent/18/27470735/Kids-get-used-to-parents-dating>.

Owens’s World Retrieved March 28, 2010 from, < http://www.owensworld.com/jokes/read-14.htm>.