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Real Friendships, Essay Example
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From the moment we are born, we seek relationships whether consciously or subconsciously. Relationships make us feel valued and remind us that we do not have to experience the joys and sorrows in life alone. While most relationships such as with parents, children, siblings, and relatives are inherited, friends are unique in the sense that we do not inherit relationships with them but instead form bonds on our own. Different people may have different definition of a friend and the popular culture has further blurred the line between an acquaintance and a friend, thanks to the growing popularity of social networks. The simplest definition of a friend should be that it is someone that can be counted upon in both good and bad times and genuinely cares about you.
Real friendship is not based on obligations but on genuine concern. A friend doesn’t support or help you because he expects something in return but instead helps and supports you because he truly desire to ease your troubles and bring you happiness. He doesn’t see you as someone who might be of economic advantage someday but instead merely appreciates your presence in his life. A real friend is able to put himself in your shoes because he truly understands your problems and happiness.
A real friend doesn’t only care about being good in your books all the time. He will not always blindly support you just because he doesn’t want a conflict. A real friend will have the courage to guide you when he believes you are on the wrong path and he could guide you. He will not care what you may think of him in the short-term because he cares more about your interests than his reputation. He understands that there are relationships where diplomacy should not have any place and friendship is one of them.
A real friend will not be afraid to take risks for your sake even if it may not be a pragmatic action. I know a girl from France who came to the U.S. to pursue her college degree. She was struggling in one of the courses due to weak English language skills and feared that she might fail the course. One of her good friends in the course sent an email to all of the classmates in order to petition the instructor if the French student could be given an extra-credit opportunity to pass the course. The guy who sent the email was one of the top performers in the course and enjoyed a great reputation with both the classmates and the instructor. Some of his classmates told him he was hurting his own reputation but he didn’t regret his action. He believed that his French friend was working hard and language put her at a real disadvantage as compared to other students. This guy definitely fits the definition of a real friend because he was able to put himself in his French friend’s shoes. Second, he was willing to take a stand for his friend because he believed she deserved support as she was working hard and was paying the price of factors outside her control.
A real friend believes in you when most of the world doubts you. A real friend knows that real life is not perfect and we do not always have control over all the circumstances that shape our lives. He understands the positive power of encouragement and the negative potential of skepticism. He gives you the courage to utilize your strengths and reminds you of the hidden potential within yourself. He understands that people can do wonder when they believe in themselves and get rid of any self-doubt that they may have.
A real friend thinks about your long-term interests rather than short-term interests. he makes sure you think carefully before choosing a course of action so that you act responsibly. This is why he is a friend of ‘all seasons’ because he sees friendship as a long-term relationship. He is not afraid to assume different roles such as that of a parent or a sibling because he is willing to go to any length to make our life easier and pleasant. Being a real friend is not an easy task and it should not be a surprise that while we can develop thousands of acquaintances in life, we would be lucky to have even two or three real friends.
We sometimes feel that a real friend understands us even better than parents and there is some truth to it. A real friend faces the same world as us, lives in the same times as us, and communicates in the same language as us. Unlike our parents who lived in different times and may measure us by old standards, a real friend measures us by the current standards. He doesn’t compare us to others like our parents even though parents’ intentions may be good. A real friend accepts us for who we are which is why he became friend in the first place.
Real friends are truly precious because the strength of our bonds with them is entirely built upon respect and care for each other. This is one relationship in which nature plays no role yet its strength is comparable to any other relationship that we value in life. Life would be really difficult without real friends even if we had everything else in the world.
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