Marriage Failure in the US, Application Essay Example

In support of the Barbara Graham’s point on failure in marriage in the US

Analytically, Graham’s passage gives more information on the marriage phenomenon. However, his arguments are based upon different myths and stories for instance; the beauty and beast, Prince Charming and Cinderella, Ginger, and Fred just to mention but a few. Here, this essay will react on the Grahams views on the fall of marriage in the US positively.

According to Barbara Graham, while most people keep looking for a sizzling romantic love with “the one, “Freud and his followers believe that to be the pointless goal of hopeless love-aholics. If that true love is found, our culture insists on its being legalized by marriage, something that did not arise prior to the 20^th century when love and lust were only a very negligible part of it. Marriage existed for economic and social needs of several institutions.

Our biochemistry is not conducive to long-term sexual relationships. Graham refers to Dr. Helen Fisher’s belief that human pair bonds are intended to last four years, At least long enough to nurture a single child. More and more Fisher and other researchers view love as a biochemical reaction controlled by enzymes and hormones, which result in three types of love; namely, lust, infatuation and, finally, a quieter and more nurturing love. However, even knowing what we know and living in a society that does not discriminate against various family styles, people are still chasing after the hopeless dream because of a deep need to connect.

Graham puts his emphasis on the fact that love is futile for many and that the long for a profound erotic connection is a forgone issue. He further affirms that it would be better for some individuals to take poison and die rather than living a life where marriage is a running faire tale. Knowingly, the above statement outlines how marriages are not successful among many individuals who tent to try their luck. The issue here is that it is better for people to embrace family values rather than trying to put romance as first priority in any marriage. Further, according to Florence, she exclaims that culture is one factor that encourages marriage to be a fantasy.

From the ancient days of the George and Martha, Graham advocates that culture has blindfolded individuals and that there is a belief that marriage and romantic love should be synonymous. In short, the above statement also concludes that marriage in the US is greatly affected by the culture of the natives. Before the 20^th century, it is true that marriage ideas were centralized with personal intimacy, this is with the accordance to W. John in the Graham’s passage. In alliteration, the point number six proclaims truly that the basics of marriage is the fulfillment of social and economic needs as well as religious institution and not lust nor love as many takes it.

Graham further insists that there is unwanted pressure that is exerted on marriage that is unprecedented. Experts have agreed that people are driven into marriage by a foundation of love, but unfortunately the love last for only four years, this again is what disrupts marriage. With the presence of chemicals, love is catalyzed and gradually peaks after two years. After that, another cycle of chemicals picks up the system disrupting people minds. This is a clear evident why some people are not resistant and that they cannot survive this cycle, and so ends up breaking marriage.

Having put that across, another illustration on why marriages is a failure in US is that, term limits on love is essential for the protection of love in a marriage suggested under principles of biochemistry. Again, due to the stubbornness of the heart, people found themselves wedding for the least third times owing to the frequent divorce. it is evident according to Graham that marriage is a well paying industry according to some therapists, psychologists and clergy men who in one way or another tries to save as or reinvent individual’s marriage. Therefore, with the above statement by Graham, it is true that marriage in the US is failing and that people are trying to struggle on how to re-establish their marriage.

Despite that every person needs to get married, still few agree that love can be constructed. It is alarming to realize that researchers affirm that Fraud has encouraged not only sexual but also dispassionate form of love. It follows that the above is one main factor that gears up failures of marriages in the US. However, according to the passage, it is wise to note that the time for 12-step programs for solving romance is outdated and that it is not wise to ignore the fact that efforts to fuse odd bedfellows has failed. Apparently, it is not easy to identify all the attention directed to the relationship and that we need definitely to do something. In conclusion, according to the passage, it is true that marriage in the US is a failure due to factors as culture and biochemical natures of human beings.