Stressors and Marital Communication, Speech Example

The importance of communication is perhaps most noticeable in a relationship. Even in a relatively young romantic relationship, barriers are often found that can lead to further conflict. In regards to marital communication, the joys of healthy communication and the realities of the opposite are all too apparent. It becomes crucial to find healthy ways to divide tasks, make important household decisions, agree on how to raise children, and many other important areas. As you might expect, research has certainly confirmed both the importance, as well as some ways to combat them.

This topic is not particularly relevant to me, as I am not married. However, anyone who has been in a meaningful romantic relationship, and/or is in such a relationship, can certainly identify the importance of communication. The ability to communicate in a healthy manner can not only lead to a more successful relationship, but overall communication-related strengths. Within a marriage, these issues are heightened due to the intimate nature of such a relationship. Surely you can value how positive communication can led to happiness – and, of course, sanity.

Stereotypes and Assumptions Confirmed

It would be reasonable to suggest that most people are aware of the importance of communication within a marriage. That is, that healthy communication is important, though note that we aren’t trying to assume that everyone knows how to communicate. Moving on from that vital distinction, research certainly helps reaffirm the significant assumptions that most of us have in this area.

One study followed 114 couples that were planning to become married for the first time (Markman, Renick, Floyd, Stanley, & Clements, 1993, 70). Citing earlier reports on the success of an preventative intervention program, the study followed up with the couples four and five years following the program. In areas such as positive communication and relationship, the results were certainly better for the group that went through the intervention program.

Overall, the study drew particular note to the ability of a program to prevent destructive marital discord. While they weren’t as strong as in previous studies, researchers noted that there are “effects clearly demonstrating a significant impact of the intervention on couples’ functioning years after the intervention” (Markman et al., 1993, 75). Certain negative elements, such as the striking noticeable tendency towards physical violence for the control group, signified the benefits of healthy communication that was gained through the program.

Another study looked at the general conversations that were found in marriages of certain life stages (Zietlow, Sillars, 1988). As opposed to the non-salient description that many retired couples gave, coupled with the lack of analytic and committal features in their remarks, middle-aged and young couples diverged. Middle-aged couples were not committal or conflictive in their discussions, but they become analytic in the face of salient problems. Younger couples were comparatively intense and engaged, and were noticeably analytic, confrontative, and humorous in their remarks. The study connected generally held views that life stage, development, and cohort influences can play a role in marital communication.

The Value of Proactive Measures

As we saw in our first study, which followed couples several years following an intervention program, proactive measures can be a firm step in the right direction. Able to teach the couple how to interact in a healthy way, and be aware of household items that can cause strife, for instance, such programs are an interesting choice. Indeed, it has certainly caught the note of many couples looking to prepare themselves and/or sort through potential communication-based features.

A recent article (Peterson, 2011) looked at the trend of expecting married couples and such programs. Citing a 2005 study in the Journal of Family Communication, it found a higher marital quality for women who were in the Bringing Home Baby workshop. This and other programs were examined in the article and praised – through statistics, studies, and recommendations by users – for their ability to help prepared the married couple for a baby. Similar to marriage itself, proactive means such as a few counseling sessions can be an important prophylactic measure for a new baby.

Connections and Significance

There are some important lessons to be learned, whether you are married or not. Arguably, the notion of awareness is especially crucial. When a couple is thinking about marriage, or even having a child together, the expectations must be approached with care. Being aware of common problems in marriage or in raising a child must be a focus, in order to be able to handle such issues with care and ease.

Many individuals and couples may be too quick to rush into things. With a lack of awareness, it is easy to get married and not talk about the “boring things” in a marriage – such as household chores, who will cook dinner, and so forth. From items like these to communication techniques, it is all quite essential.

Overall, communication can help bridge the gap in a marriage when difficulties loom. Having the general awareness of the situation, as well as the specific awareness of one’s mate, can lead to positive steps. This knowledge, understanding, and the specific means that come along with these features are not only useful in relationships, but extend throughout one’s life.

References

Markman, H. J., Renick, J. R., Floyd, J. F., Stanley, S.M., and Clements, M. (1993). Preventing Marital distress Through Communication and Conflict Management Training: A 4- and 5-Year Follow-Up. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 61(1), 70-77.

Petersen, A. (2011). So Cute, So Hard on a Marriage. Wall Street Journal. Retrieved from http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704099704576288954011675900.html

Zietlow, P. H. and Sillars, A. L. (1988). Life-Stage Differences in Communication During Marital Conflicts. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 5(2), 223-45.